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Divorce & Separation
Many children will see their parents separate or divorce. When parents decide to split, it can be a very difficult time for children and young people. Separation may mean children losing the home they are used to, changing school and losing friends, not seeing one parent on a regular basis and hearing their parents rowing.

Coping with these changes is not easy for anyone, and many children feel sad, guilty, angry and abandoned.

These feelings can lead to emotional and behavioural problems, such as disobedience, nightmares or clinginess. As a parent, you may be dealing with very difficult feelings yourself and it is sometimes hard to protect your children from these.

However it is important to try and show them they are loved by both parents, and that the problem is not their fault. Try not to argue in front of them or use them in your disputes and if possible ensure they have a relationship with both parents, however acrimonious your split has been.

Children should not be made to feel bad about missing the parent that no longer lives with them.

How are children affected?
  • A sense of loss - separation from a parent can mean you lose not only your home, but your whole way of life.
  • Different, with an unfamiliar family
  • Fearful about being left alone - if one parent can go, perhaps the other will do the same
  • Angry at one or both parents for the relationship breakdown
  • Worried about having caused the parental separation: guilty
  • Rejected and insecure
  • Torn between both parents